The Loneliness of Cancer... by Leah Singh
Leah is a 34 year old mum, blogger and YouTuber from Liverpool. You may remember her from her previous blog about wearing the cold cap during chemotherapy. Leah was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 32 but has recently received the wonderful news that she is cured.
One of the less spoken about factors of a cancer journey is the loneliness that may be suffered along the way.
Not everybody is aware of this side of the disease, other than the patient themselves. The lack of understanding and knowledge about this part of the journey can result in the patient becoming and feeling extremely isolated.
I think that most patients feel like this to some degree, regardless of the support system that they have around them. Cancer can be such a lonely journey that one must walk alone, and that can become one of the scariest things about it. I found that it is like walking on unknown territories with nobody there to hold your hand or no security blanket to keep you safe.
I felt alone, like nobody could understand me no matter how much I tried to communicate what I was going through. It was almost like there was a language barrier between me and everybody else. All of a sudden I became an alien, I became different. People treated me differently, or didn't know how to talk to me after they found out I had cancer. It resulted in awkwardness. I often felt like I was at the bottom of a dark well and I didnt know how to get myself out. It is a really unique experience and very hard to put into words. But this experience can only make you stronger.
Reflecting on my own cancer journey, this was definitely the hardest, toughest part. I really struggled with this and I felt that it effected me terribly, especially mentally. Although I felt very strong and positive the majority of the time, I felt that the loneliness set back my recovery and made my depression, which I was experiencing at the time due to my illness, a lot worse.
This was not a pleasant thing to go through, but the person I have become because of it only makes me happy. Sometimes we have to sink to the bottom in order to rise to the top, and this is most definitely what you will take from this experience.
No matter what life throws your way, learn to take those negatives and turn them into positives. Even on the dark days. The cancer journey eventually makes you fearless and a force to be reckoned with.
Just know that even though every experience of loneliness is different, all cancer patients face loneliness somewhere along the way. It is all part of the process unfortunately. I found that seeking therapy every week really helped. Talking about everything really made me feel so much better. I highly recommend this to anybody experiencing loneliness during cancer.
It is so important that this topic is highlighted, because patients go through so much already and the loneliness can be extremely detriment to their well being.
I truly believe that there should be more support and understanding surrounding loneliness and cancer. Once you are diagnosed, you are thrown into a unknown world, a very intense one filled with fear and hospital appointments. Getting used to treatments can play havoc with your mind, body and soul, but there is always somewhere to get help, or someone who will listen to how you are feeling, even if it doesn't always feel that way.
Leah can be found on instagram: @blessedwithcancer. See some of her posts below:
